(: - saneitiny.livejournal.com
_________________________________________________________________________
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
heart and mind, a moment together.
Im suppose to chiong ITI journals now, but still have to read some article that ezzat has convinced me to be interesting. guess i blog abit to get my mind working on the early morning. oh and it's 930am now. it's irritating how my blog's timing is always wrong. it's behind time for like 15hours. /:
i was walking home with dinner yesterday when i saw this scene.
at the cake shop: a daddy was holding two children, they were chinese speaking. they don't look like they had a lot of education. they don't look very rich. the children, both boys were about 7,8 years of age. daddy was talking to the cake shop keeper, i heard him ask 'how much?'
the shopkeeper says 'ten dollars, eighty cents.'
when i turned to look they were all staring at the small chocolate cake in the display. and one of the boys, the older one i think, was tugging at daddy's hand.
daddy asked him 'you want is it?' (in chinese).
then the next thing i heard was, 'er, okay la, i buy.'
it just got me thinking as to how many times this would have happened in a child's life. as a child grows up. how parents or grandparents would throw away money just to make their kids smile.
it reminded me of, popo.
i remember when i was a little girl, popo took me out to westmall to walk around. i was feeling cold and i told her about it. we weren't really doing anything, just shopping for a few stuff.
then she brought me into tom & stephanie, and to the jackets section. a blue jacket caught my eye, and she noticed. she bought it down for me without thinking much. i remember it was twenty odd bucks.
and just because, i was cold.
the stupid thing is that i no longer wear that jacket anymore. it's too small for me. but everytime i think back,
popo just loves me too much.
it doesn't take a psychology student to think and encounter various emotional incidents portraying human behavior between relationships. even a cake shop aunty might see this everyday.
if i were a cake shop aunty and i see this everyday, would i get numbed to it? or would i still think so much? haha.
mmm.
okay now, back to work! today journals due 5pm. tmr biblio due 3pm. monday iti report due 5pm. tuesday, iep paper.
sigh.
i was walking home with dinner yesterday when i saw this scene.
at the cake shop: a daddy was holding two children, they were chinese speaking. they don't look like they had a lot of education. they don't look very rich. the children, both boys were about 7,8 years of age. daddy was talking to the cake shop keeper, i heard him ask 'how much?'
the shopkeeper says 'ten dollars, eighty cents.'
when i turned to look they were all staring at the small chocolate cake in the display. and one of the boys, the older one i think, was tugging at daddy's hand.
daddy asked him 'you want is it?' (in chinese).
then the next thing i heard was, 'er, okay la, i buy.'
it just got me thinking as to how many times this would have happened in a child's life. as a child grows up. how parents or grandparents would throw away money just to make their kids smile.
it reminded me of, popo.
i remember when i was a little girl, popo took me out to westmall to walk around. i was feeling cold and i told her about it. we weren't really doing anything, just shopping for a few stuff.
then she brought me into tom & stephanie, and to the jackets section. a blue jacket caught my eye, and she noticed. she bought it down for me without thinking much. i remember it was twenty odd bucks.
and just because, i was cold.
the stupid thing is that i no longer wear that jacket anymore. it's too small for me. but everytime i think back,
popo just loves me too much.
it doesn't take a psychology student to think and encounter various emotional incidents portraying human behavior between relationships. even a cake shop aunty might see this everyday.
if i were a cake shop aunty and i see this everyday, would i get numbed to it? or would i still think so much? haha.
mmm.
okay now, back to work! today journals due 5pm. tmr biblio due 3pm. monday iti report due 5pm. tuesday, iep paper.
sigh.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
painful thoughts
For Aihui,
suddenly thought of that day when i was sitting at the table outside fc6 with dadp, suddenly saw this group of people carrying cute big yellow glowing balloons. balloons just make my day. i immediately wanted one. and then i saw aihui, so i got one from her. my fellow dadpians were excited too. think its just a dadp thing. haha. then we took childish photos and everything. it was some campaign to choose to be happy or something. haha, so we 'chose' to be happy and happily took away the balloons and the smiley clips they gave us. haha, and this really nice namecard things that say:
whatever thoughts are causing you pain they are only thoughts. Happiness is a daily decision.
i suddenly think of Michelle when i read this. i used to tell her how we can control being happy or not. but now, it's me myself who can't seem to do it. Michelle darling, are you happy now? i hope you are. i'd be too.
i'd try.
i guess i've been thinking too much. cause there's just so much to think about. the worse thing is that, its not the work thats putting me down, it's the emotional factor in this whole process, where i'm not happy inside, but i am that you all are. where i face the loneliness, to take away yours. where i cannot afford to be disorganised just cause i'll lose out. not cause i'll fail, but cause i'd be lonely. where everything in this world is based on merit. and im not talking about studies. where i can't afford to be complacent, cause i'm simply not perfect. where i just..
need to keep reminding myself that.
yes, maybe i'm thinking too much, to hurt myself. i pray Lord you'd grant me more optimistism in my life.
cause wad's causing me pain are only thoughts, and i can control, happiness is a daily decision, it's my decision, gail.
suddenly thought of that day when i was sitting at the table outside fc6 with dadp, suddenly saw this group of people carrying cute big yellow glowing balloons. balloons just make my day. i immediately wanted one. and then i saw aihui, so i got one from her. my fellow dadpians were excited too. think its just a dadp thing. haha. then we took childish photos and everything. it was some campaign to choose to be happy or something. haha, so we 'chose' to be happy and happily took away the balloons and the smiley clips they gave us. haha, and this really nice namecard things that say:
whatever thoughts are causing you pain they are only thoughts. Happiness is a daily decision.
i suddenly think of Michelle when i read this. i used to tell her how we can control being happy or not. but now, it's me myself who can't seem to do it. Michelle darling, are you happy now? i hope you are. i'd be too.
i'd try.
i guess i've been thinking too much. cause there's just so much to think about. the worse thing is that, its not the work thats putting me down, it's the emotional factor in this whole process, where i'm not happy inside, but i am that you all are. where i face the loneliness, to take away yours. where i cannot afford to be disorganised just cause i'll lose out. not cause i'll fail, but cause i'd be lonely. where everything in this world is based on merit. and im not talking about studies. where i can't afford to be complacent, cause i'm simply not perfect. where i just..
need to keep reminding myself that.
yes, maybe i'm thinking too much, to hurt myself. i pray Lord you'd grant me more optimistism in my life.
cause wad's causing me pain are only thoughts, and i can control, happiness is a daily decision, it's my decision, gail.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
i realise everyday.
my throat hurts so bad. as though the skin inside my throat has been scrubbed by a scrub or something. these few weeks many things have happened in this little life of mine.
1) i realise im an ESFP. though i know through all that i'm going through, im gonna turn J soon.
2) i opened up to a classmate, almost everything about me. everything that made me to who i am now.
3) i realise, a person's experience and family background makes up the whole of someone's character. and siblings play a big big part.
4) i'm too stubborn.
5) i realise wearing high heels isn't a very nice thing.
6) i lack sleep once again.
7) i bought a little pink netbook. but am too lazy to go configure. i don't even have microsoft office. hahaha.
next week ive a total of 5 assignments due. but at the end of next week, pkc retreat. probably thats what i can look forward too. just pure rest and relax. and fun of course. finally. i'm still wondering if i should leave retreat on sat night to go for ezzat's party. mm. i'll decide when the time comes la. haha. i saw randee when i was out with clem today. it was so hilarious seeing her in the middle of no where.
i better go sleep now, trying to download adobe flash so i can watch vids on youtube. ugh, it's been half an hr but it's still at 33%!! think i'll just leave my netbook on for the night. haha. grace wants me to wear green tmr. but the only green i have is, my exze tshirt? haha. o well. nights my lovely world. it's been a great day today. (:
1) i realise im an ESFP. though i know through all that i'm going through, im gonna turn J soon.
2) i opened up to a classmate, almost everything about me. everything that made me to who i am now.
3) i realise, a person's experience and family background makes up the whole of someone's character. and siblings play a big big part.
4) i'm too stubborn.
5) i realise wearing high heels isn't a very nice thing.
6) i lack sleep once again.
7) i bought a little pink netbook. but am too lazy to go configure. i don't even have microsoft office. hahaha.
next week ive a total of 5 assignments due. but at the end of next week, pkc retreat. probably thats what i can look forward too. just pure rest and relax. and fun of course. finally. i'm still wondering if i should leave retreat on sat night to go for ezzat's party. mm. i'll decide when the time comes la. haha. i saw randee when i was out with clem today. it was so hilarious seeing her in the middle of no where.
i better go sleep now, trying to download adobe flash so i can watch vids on youtube. ugh, it's been half an hr but it's still at 33%!! think i'll just leave my netbook on for the night. haha. grace wants me to wear green tmr. but the only green i have is, my exze tshirt? haha. o well. nights my lovely world. it's been a great day today. (:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)